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Sunday, October 30, 2011

A Mini-Challenge for Sunday

Dance the night away...


'The Singing Butler' by Jack Vettriano


It was Lillian Susan Thomas who introduced me to the Waltz Wave Form several years ago.  She explained it to me thus:

 

As for the Waltz Wave Form, it's easier than haiku because it relies only on a syllable count without all the other requirements: 
The longest line has 4 syllables, for a total of 19 lines and 38 syllables. Each line is composed of the following syllable counts in succession:

 
1,2,1,2,3,2,1,2,3,4,3,2,1,2,3,2,1,2,1


She also offered this advice:
It works best with 1 -2 syllable words; use a thesaurus to find a short equivalent for the word you want to use. (We all get brain freeze occasionally.) If yellow won't fit, try gold, or bronze, or eliminate an adjective. 
And the other hint is you start recasting your sentence when it doesn't work.  When you find you are stuck, it is probably because you have fallen in love with one way of saying it. When you like the way some phrase sounds and can't turn it around or inside out, let go of the first phrasing to find a better one. 

Lillian kindly allowed me to use her work as an example, and you can read another on her blog, From the Heart's Garden, if you click HERE

*Fall Leaves Fly (A Waltz Wave)


Fall 
leaves fly 
past 
the bus 
moving through 
traffic. 
A 
child's face 
pressed against 
the window looks 
out at folks, 
standing 
at 
bus stops, 
walking on 
the streets 
all 
a blur - 
gone.



Lillian Susan Thomas



This link remains open all week for anyone who would like to post a poem later than Sunday.

10 comments:

  1. I have taken a waltz wave poem out of my archives, reworked it a bit, and posted it here by way of demonstration. Not perfect by any means. I think one must write a few to get a real feel for the flow of the form.

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  2. Oh wow. I love this concept! Fantastic poem too - love it - thank you for sharing these fab stuff here! It's such a shame I was born with two left feet but I do try to get a rhythm going (badly - but I try!!! LOL!). Take care
    x

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  3. I've jumped on board between carving pumpkins...

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  4. I didnt know that my short lines were a form. I have been writing this way for years, not knowing it is an actual form! Hee hee. So this should be an easy challenge.

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  5. I love Jack Vettriano's work so had to respond to this:-)

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  6. @ jabblog: Thanks for identifying the artist for me. I have acknowledged it now.

    I'm glad you tried this one out.

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  7. I love this form... thanks, Kerry.

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  8. This was especially fun ... thank you.

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  9. I really enjoyed this challenge, Kerry. Thanks!

    Kay, Alberta, Canada
    An Unfittie’s Guide to Adventurous Travel

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  10. Belatedly, I've had a go at the Waltz Wave form. Interesting, trying to work it out. Thanks for suggesting it.

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